Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Retard Steve says, "Drink to the life giving animals!"

Last night was an exciting night for me, I had many new dreams.

My first dream was about the unification of the alcohol section and the frozen food section at super market. Where the alcohol and ice cream sections overlapped I discovered boozecream, the ice cream that gets you drunk. Now everyone including you and me, not just fat girls, can feel better by eating an entire carton of ice cream.

In my second dream I was a ninja, a ninja sent fourth to liberate the vacant homes of America from the squatter plague. I would enter a vacant home and lay in the dark waiting, I would wait for as long as it took for a squatter to enter the home, when the waiting ended, I would destroy the squatter using my Ninja shotgun. I literally destroyed the squatters since immortals can't be killed, I separated their bodies into countless pieces which I distributed across the land so that the squatters could never reassemble themselves and occupy another vacant home.

My third dream I was the CEO of a huge game development company, seriously massive, larger than any game development company on earth. I wore a sweet suit similar to the one worn by Sean Connery in Highlander II: The Quickening. The dream was united with a reoccurring theme of my life, I have always imagined how great it would be to have a work force made of clones of me, but these clones would have a better work ethic and sleep less than me. The night dream wasn't as great as my day dream, I only had one clone and he was retarded, but he looked exactly like me and he had a sweet suit exactly the same as mine. My clones clothes and fantastic good looks didn't really make up for him being retarded, but according to my dream ethics retarded Steve should be treated exactly as I would treat a non-retarded Steve clone. In my dream I introduced my new CO-CEO to my existing work force made up of every stripe of nerd and alcoholic womanizer. Retard Steve and I stood together in our matching suits and I instructed everyone to do exactly as Retard Steve says.

In my fourth dream I was a savage hunter conquering the forested wilderness of precolonial North America. It was a delightful dream, I taught myself to make weapons like spears, bows and arrows and small metal daggers, primitive weapons proved incredibly complex, before this dream I had never appreciated the difficulties involved in making the most basic of weapons. As the dream progressed I initiated an animist cult and accumulated a large following of co-believers. We worshiped the animal spirits of the female Deer, the female Skunk, the female Possum, the female Birds... you get the idea... At my command, the cult built a massive stone temple devoted to the female spirits of the animal kingdom, inside of the cult temple we built a giant statue of me, made of natures glue and the ground up bones of the female animals we feasted upon, the statue represented the united spirits of the animals which lost their lives to give us life. Whenever we weren't eating or sleeping, we drank various animal derived liquors and sang glorious songs to commemorate the life giving animals.

Those are all the dreams I can remember from last night.

Today I spent working on Moon Base 3D, NinjaPants says the first 95% of game development is making the game and the second 95% of game development is finishing the game, and I believe it. I finished mapping out the level framework and I added two new buildable structures.

I was planning to post a family portrait of the games buildings today, but I have one more planned building to go, so the family portrait will have to wait tell tomorrow. As for tonight, I hope to be visited again by more inspirational maniac versions of myself.

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